The Christmas That Shouldn't Have Been
by racefh853629
Summary: Set in Season 4. Dean and Sam celebrate Christmas, if for no other reason than to have a last Christmas without the undertone of "Dean'll be dead next year."


A/N: I don't own Supernatural, the CW, or any other known entity contained within this story. This idea came to me around Christmas, and I started writing it then, but I couldn't figure out where it was going... until now. So, having said that, thanks to **speed_cochrane** for gift ideas! This story is centered in the Season 4 timeline, pretty much sometime after Heaven and Hell and before Death Takes a Holiday. I hope you guys enjoy the story, and please review. :)

* * *

The Christmas That Shouldn't Have Been

Sam sits back against the pillows in another crappy motel room, bringing his knees up toward his chest before fanning his legs out to sit Indian-style. He stares at the powered-off TV, his mind wandering.

Last year, he had been sitting in a room not dissimilar to this one, trying to celebrate what he thought would be his final Christmas with Dean. He can't get that feeling out of his head- the feeling that his journey with his brother is supposed to be over, that Dean isn't supposed to be here.

He should be thankful that Dean is here now, alive and kicking and... well, everything else that is Dean. Instead, he can't quite figure out how he feels.

So much has happened since the last Christmas.

Sam has seen Dean die, his body destroyed by Hell Hounds, which wasn't included in the thousand or so ways that the Trickster killed Dean at the Mystery Spot. Sam has also forged a deeper bond with Ruby, who he simultaneously trusts and doesn't want to listen to. Dean has come back from Hell, pulled out by Castiel. They have learned that Uriel is a dick and Anna fell, but what's become of her now is a good question.

And now, here Sam sits in the dark of this motel, another Christmas down in the books as the war wages on between Heaven and Hell.

He wonders how exactly this whole thing got started- Heaven versus Hell battling on Earth this time. He knows somehow the first seal got broken, but how was that? Was it something that Sam did? Dean? Something someone else did?

When and how did this war begin?

Sam shakes his head, not wanting to think more on the breaking seals and the mess they're currently in. It's Christmas. Heaven and Hell's battles can wait for another day.

Dean walks in, eyeing Sam curiously. "You're brooding again," the older brother comments, his tone teasing as he puts down the bag he has in his arms.

"Bite me," Sam replies bitterly.

"Dude. Come on. It's Christmas."

Sam scoffs lightly. "I know what day it is, Dean."

Dean shakes his head, holding up his hands. "Fine, Grinch."

Sam chuckles slightly, remembering Dean calling him that last year, too, affter Sam said that he didn't want to have Christmas. Yet this year, there has been no talk about it.

They're just having it.

Sam glances to the tree in the corner, the one that's better than last year's, but not their best yet. That title goes to Christmas in '91, when Dean went out of his way to make the day special for Sam. Which was why Sam conceded to celebrating the holiday last year. And this year… well, they need another Christmas. If for no other reason than that their last celebrated Christmas wouldn't have the undertone of 'never going to happen again.'

"You still with us, Scrooge?" Dean asks.

Sam shakes his head. "Yeah, I'm here," he replies.

"What's goin' on in that freaky head of yours?"

"Nothin', really. Just thinkin'."

"About?"

"Christmas."

Dean sticks his lower lip out slightly as he nods, understanding what Sam means.

Sam chuckles lightly. "Our lives are weird, man," he says.

Dean smiles. "Yeah, that's putting it lightly," he remarks.

"Last year… you… and, well…"

Dean sighs. "Yeah, I know."

"Didn't think we'd…"

Dean nods. "I know. But hey, we are. So stop bein' mopey, dammit."

Sam laughs quietly.

Dean smiles. "There we go." He rummages through the bag he brought in, pulling out cups and eggnog. "I'm hoping we have the rum around here somewhere…"

"Freezer," Sam says with a nod.

"Mix it up, Bartender."

"Why am I the bartender?"

Dean grins. "Because you're better at the eggnog than I am."

Sam shrugs, climbing off of the bed and making his way to the freezer. He pulls out the bottle of Captain Morgan that he bought last night, specifically with this moment in mind. He turns around to find Dean has pulled out two other bags from within the bag he brought in. Smirking, Dean passes the two bags to Sam.

"Here," the older brother says.

Sam smiles, putting the bottle of Captain down and accepting Dean's gifts. He, in turn, digs out the gifts he bought for Dean, neatly wrapped in newspaper. Dean takes the proffered gifts from Sam.

Sam mixes the eggnog before opening his presents, knowing that Dean would wait until after Sam had opened the bags before unwrapping his own. Sam passes a cup to Dean for the official taste-test, who takes a sip and coughs.

"Dude, this is stronger than last year," he comments.

"Too strong?" Sam asks.

"No. I mean, it's good. It's just stronger than last year."

Sam takes a sip himself and coughs. "Yeah, it is. But I like it better."

"Me too." Dean sits down, and Sam follows suit.

Sam finally opens one of the bags, producing a 40 ounce bottle of beer. "My favorite kind," he comments happily, putting it aside to open the second bag. He withdraws a blow-up doll, and his face of horror thoroughly delights Dean.

"Same premise as Ruby," Dean merely says in explanation, and Sam throws the doll at Dean, who cackles. "There's some skin mags in there too," Dean adds as he calms down a little.

"Thanks," Sam says, somewhat sincerely. After all, he likes the beer and porn.

Dean continues to laugh at his Christmas joke as he starts to open the first gift. He pulls out a bottle of motor oil, just like Sam got last year. "I like," Dean says, grinning. He opens the other for a framed picture of Roma Downey's body with Castiel's face. "Dude, what the hell?"

Sam chuckles. "Figured you'd want a keepsake of being 'Touched by an Angel'," he explains amidst his laughter.

Dean glares at Sam before looking at the picture. "How long'd you spend in Photoshop?"

"Not very."

"That's pretty good, Sammy."

"Thanks."

Dean moves the picture frame aside to find an AC/DC tape, the same one that Sam had broken earlier in the week. "Thanks, Sammy," he says.

"Welcome," Sam replies, taking a drink from his glass.

Dean picks up his own glass, turning to Sam. "Merry Christmas, bro," he says.

"Merry Christmas."

They clink glasses and each take a drink, sighing afterwards.

"Should we watch the game?" Sam asks.

"Absolutely," Dean says, standing up and turning the TV on.

The End


End file.
